Happy 1st Birthday to our Girls!

We've created a celebration video: 

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Cooper & Mark are featured in Gay Parent Magazine

We're happy to share the news that we've been featured in an article in the May/June issue of Gay Parent magazine!

The article discusses same sex couples choice of egg donors for surrogacy. Check it out and let us know what you think. Download the article here.


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A Day In The Life (aka The Shit Show)

Mark left to work in the city for a few days so it’s me and Mother Love (our baby nurse) and the girls. I thought I would get a jump-start by having the Ford truck inspected since it was 6 months past due (I grew tired of driving down dirt roads fearing the po po). Anyways, my great mechanic grimly told me “no no.” No no? What? He delivered the tragic news that it was “time to bury the big white girl” that being my Ford F150 b/c it’s so rusted it’s hanging by a thread. Shit!
My drive back to the farm was filled with horrific fears about my truck as I drove 40 miles per hour. “What if the truck falls off it’s axel and hits someone and we both die? If I die then that leaves Mark having to be a single dad?” Or, worse “what if I actually survive and become disabled with bags and tubes attached to every one of my holes and Mark having to care for all three of us?” Yes, this was my madness of mind.  The other side of crazy if you will. Yes, just call me Dark Martha. Needless to say, I made it home in one piece, but now I had no wheels in the middle of nowhere.


Something happens when you have children. I had been warned and dismissed it. But it’s now fer reals. It’s like your brain gets all but sucked out by the universe leaving you a parental zombie. Yes yes yes my dear friends I GET IT! SHIT YES I GET IT! What happened thereafter is funnier more today than it was yesterday.


I decided to check on the trap Mark set for the wild cat that’s been gang banging our poor kitties MiMi and Cheddar. He set the “Have-A-Heart” (does it really have heart? Really?) in a large box. From what I could see, the trap door was closed. OMG! BINGO! Did we get the wild sociopathic feline rapist? I stepped a little closer. Then a little closer then it become very very clear. We had caught a beast all right but, it was the kind that sprays nasty rancid eye tearing fog and stomach wrenching skank into the air. I ran screaming like a 3 year old. A skunk! Why today?”


It was time to feed, burp and wash up the sweet treasures we call our Lady Bugs. It became clear when I entered the room that another skank smell had taken over inside the house. CC had a goo poo in her diaper. When I unearthed the pamper green and brown crap came flying out followed by a stank that could be used for chemical warfare. “OH MY GOD! “ I cried out. Lady Love started to laugh but within seconds of her mocking she soon echoed my pain with an “OH LORD HAVE MERCY!”


So, being the Daddy, I started to wash the green-brown mush explosion within the damaged perimeter. Just as I had her all ready for her clean sweet smelling pamper she decides to power pee all over my hands and sweatshirt. I thought only boys power shot like that? Oh contrare.
After washing the girls up I decided to start calling car dealers about a new car and what kind of deal I could get. Well, I went on line and offered up my phone number to contact me at home. Within seconds I had call after call after call after call from dealers wanting my business. Note to self: “NEVER EVER EVER GIVE YOUR DIGITS OUT!” I’m changing our number forever!
Calling out from the nursery upstairs Lady Love asked “Do we have more formula?” Gulp. Shit. Gulp. Double Shit Shit! We didn’t have a drop left and we were also out of breast milk. WTF. Could we feed them Skunk stew?   I had ordered some forumla from Amazon.com however my zombie brain clicked the wrong shipping method! We were out of breast milk and formula with no car in the middle of red neck utopia. I glanced at Mother Love and half jokingly said “Are you sure you can’t breast feed?”  She’s 74.


Thankfully, we had Ingrid here and she kindly loaned me her Yaris. A Yaris? It sounds like an ass rash of sorts. Well, the “Yaris” is basically a go-cart that only my left butt cheek could fit into. Yes, I squeezed my 6’5” middle aged ass in and drove off to Walmart to get formula. Yes, Walmart….DO NOT JUDGE ME! Well, contrary to popular belief, Walmart does indeed run out of items. And yesterday they were out of the formula we needed. Next, Rite Aid. THEY HAD IT. PRAISE THE BABY J! I left like I had won the lottery.


As I sat in the parking lot at Rite Aid with my formula in hand I pondered my feelings. I missed Mark terribly as he’s a terrific grounding source for me. What would Mark ask me right now? Got it! “Are you hungry, angry lonely or tired? H.A.L.T.” Yes, I was exhausted but I can handle that. Angry? Just with myself. Lonely? Sure. Hungry? MASSIVELY. Shit, there was no food in the house and there was NO WAY I was venturing into ShopRite in Monticello. Hell no. So, I decided to call Lady Love.


“Lady Love?” I asked.


“Yeees” she most sweetly responded in her perfect Trinidadian accent.


“Do you wanna go to the dark side with me today? Will you partake in…..in…..in…..a WENDY’S HAMBURGER AND A FROSTY?


“YEEEEEESSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!” she squeeled with excitement. No, we both squeeled in excitement.
Driving 74 miles per hour back in my trembling Yaris with windows wide open, burgers and shakes in the seat and the cool Fall mountain air madly tossing about my newly Kerotined hair, I laughed as I salivated thinking about what a Wendy’s was going to taste like.  Bliss.


The sun set.  I made supper for me and Lady Love (leftovers from, from…from….oh screw it I can’t remember) and then sat on the sofa contemplating the day while eating a Lindt salted dark chocolate bar.  I dozed off deep only to be awakened by the feeling of a mushy dark wet texture under my backside.  What the?  What is that?  Jesus! Alas, I had fallen asleep on my chocolate bar leaving a 17 inch smear all over the sofa and my ass. So, I scrubbed and scrubbed, conjuring up memories of my mother wildly attacking the stains, smears and crud we would leave on her white wall to wall carpeting.  Hey, it’s all good. At least it’s not brown-green goo poo. Perspective is key.
Right now it is very clear that whatever the chaos that swirls about on my best planned days there will always be lovely calm in the center of the chaos that I call home.


My children.
My partner.
I am finally home. It’s a shit show and I love it.
*BTW, please don’t tell Mark about the Wendy’s Burgers. The judgement will kill me.

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A Letter To Our Daughters

Dear CeliaRose and Crosby,


It feels like we’ve been waiting life times for you to arrive and now your day is very very near. We both dreamed of having children our whole lives, even in times when that wasn’t very possible for two daddies. But hey, we are dreamers of the impossible! When Daddy Mark met Papa Cooper that seemingly impossible dream became a reality.   The power of deep faith and placing intentions into the world works. You both are testimony to that.


Papa and Daddy are here waiting with a vast sea of others for you to arrive into our world. We want you to know there has been nothing but pure joy and love surrounding your creation. The ingredients for the winning recipe of your beautiful humanness has been:


1. Start with a soulful, talented IVF doctor named Gad Lavy
2. Add one loving anonymous egg donor
3. Stir in some of us
4. Mix it all together with two Angels from NorthEast Surrogacy Partners
5. Then add in ONE very magical woman named Veronica (to carry you for 9 months)


Your surrogate, Veronica, cared for you in her belly like you were her very own even though you are not biologically related to her. We often tell people that if we were able to carry you in our bellies, we could never have met the high standard of love and mindfulness that Veronica has given you. And, not only did we get Veronica in our lives, but we also got her partner Shari and their daughter Samantha as part of the miraculous deal! SCORE!

CC & Crosby Boone Veeder, God has bestowed a great bounty of love in which you are deeply rooted. This love will be the foundation for your growth. Our hope is that you will spread this very deep love wherever you land. We await with such full hearts, anticipating our lives together as we all try to make this world a better place. We are the most blessed fathers-to-be in the entire universe, it’s hard to even comprehend the magnitude and depth of this epic gift. We stand in awe, ready to shower you both with our love + affection + hugs + kisses. NOW HURRY UP AND GET HERE BECAUSE WE ARE READY TO EXPLODE!!!


Love,
Papa Cooper and Daddy Mark

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All Is OK!

I know I know, we’ve been horrible about updating this blog.  Honestly,  this feeling of bliss has caused us to be a little behind the eight ball.  Our apologies.  So, Queen V is doing really really well.  The babies are each 5.5 lbs and are growing big little ladies!  They should be arriving any time. Our official due date is 9-8 but twins tend to come 3 to 4 weeks early.  What’s your guess?
How is everyone out there doing this summer huh?
Loving you all!
Cooper and Mark

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Week 23, Baby Registry, Names and Advice

Well, we are finally at week 23 and it feels sooooooooooo good!  The babies are the sizes of large mangos this week weighing each about 11 oz. Queen V is great and she reports that the twincesses are moving around a lot in there.


It’s been quite a cray cray past few weeks here in babyland as we scrambled to finish our baby registry(s).  MAN OH MAN!  We never realized just how much  “stuff” is out there to choose from.  Whoosh! Fortunately, many helped us hone in on some of our choices which was a huge help.  Our friends have been amazing so we thank you ten fold.  We are feeling very loved by all of you so thank you for your tips, should/should nots and must haves.


Updates on us: Cooper is  pushing to finish his next album in Nashville this month while Mark,  “the constant gardener”, is prepping the gardens.  June and July are filled with 5 baby showers so it’s gonna be whirlwind.  Many of you have asked for our registry(s) so here they are:
Amazon.com:   http://www.amazon.com/registry/baby/28SI0GMXR5D8I
Giggle.com:  https://www.giggle.com/registry/90558


We are close to our decision on names.  Do you have any suggestions?
Cooper and Mark

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Week 18: Guess the Genders

Well, on Monday March 24th we found ourselves back at Doc Landry’s for another sonogram and “Gender Day”.  Boys?  Girls?  Boy/Girl?

GIRLS!

Bell Peppers! Week 18
Head to rump, our babies are about 5 1/2 inches long, and weigh almost 7 ounces… think  bell pepper size. They are flexing arms and legs. Blood vessels are visible through their thin skin, and their ears are now in their final position, although they’re still standing out from their heads . A protective covering of myelin is beginning to form around their nerves, a process that will continue for a year after they are born.
 
I FEEL AS BIG AS A HOUSE!
“I’m now  18 weeks pregnant with twins, and starting to show to anyone who knows me.  To people who don’t know me, they have no idea yet.  I’m glad, because I know I have a long way to go and when this belly pops, it’s going to be out there.  That being said, it doesn’t matter how I don’t LOOK pregnant, some days internally I feel as big as a house.  Much like a lumbering and waddling, in spite of barely showing.  It’s an odd phenomenon to experience. I also have days I don’t notice a difference at all…that’s usually until I’m up for a little while and then I have a revelation that yes, yes I am indeed carrying 2 growing ‘aliens’ inside me, and I need a nap!  I’m not a napper by nature, but I will tell you I set an alarm at work and take a refreshing napping break some days.  It helps.  It’s easier to carry around a house when you’re rested.  :)  
 I’ll be checking in, to share more with everyone!”
 Queen V

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Week 16

It’s been wonderfully crazy these past days. Ya’ll have been so supportive and loving since our announcement of our twins. This past Saturday night we had a big “Spring Fling” party in NYC just to celebrate life. Queen “V”, our surrogate, was there along with her partner Shari and the beautiful cast of rich characters we call our family. It was a night to remember! Queen V is now 16 weeks preggers!

I must admit, there are momentary waves of high anxiety that crash unexpectedly. To counter my anxiety I make list upon lists which give me a thinly veiled false sense of control and calm. As you can imagine, I have been gathering a rapidly growing giant beanstalk list of “things to get ready for.” Then suddenly, with God’s perfect timing, a great piece of advice appeared before me. In the middle of our party my childhood friend Sue simply turned to me and said, “Don’t get crazy with being ready. You’ll figure it all out as you go…people have been doing with for a while now!” I felt a sudden calm wash over me. She’s right. JUST CHILL. It will all work out fine. Amen!
Inside 16 Weeks
Inside 16 Weeks
 
Did someone say babies? Speaking of babies, our babes will double their weight and add inches to their length. Right now, they are each about the size of an avocado: 4 1/2 inches long (head to rump) and 3 1/2 ounces each. Their legs are much more developed, heads are more erect and eyes have moved closer to the front of their heads. Their ears are close to their final position, too. The patterning of the scalp has begun, though their locks aren’t recognizable yet. They have even started growing toenails! And, there’s a lot happening inside as well. For example, their hearts are now each pumping about 25 quarts of blood each day, and this amount will continue to increase as they continue to develop.
 
Next week on March 24th we all meet with our baby doc to find out the genders of the babies! STAY TUNED!

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OMG WE ARE PREGGERS WITH TWINS!

The challenges of two men having a biological baby are many however, what we didn’t expect was the deepening of our relationship amidst this often bumpy and fragile road.  Our first miscarriage was awful, just plain awful.  We wept, mourning for our little ones (twins as well) who didn’t make it.  Yet, one of the benchmarks for our relationship is tenacity. We simply never ever give up, holding each other up in order to move forward.  So, we moved forward and eventually found Veronica who is so much more to us then a paid surrogate.  She’s like family. I know you’re wondering if the eggs are hers.  The answer is no.  We chose eggs from an egg bank.  Yes, it’s as bizarre as it sounds.  Think Sears catalogue of human eggs! So, Veronica (or Queen “V” as we like to call her) is the magical incubator for our little fertilized eggs.


Happiness is a strange beast.  It waxes and wanes, often being elusive.  Since becoming preggers with twins new feelings have emerged beyond expectation. Our happiness  level has sky rocketed and maintained itself.  Okay okay I’ve have an occasional “beotch” moment or two!  It’s such new territory, this feeling of knowing we are the parents of two growing human beings. When we heard heart beats for the first time we were jettisoned into this crazy ass feeling of bliss.  Babies.  Heartbeats. Love.  Connection.  Dreams Fulfilled.  Magic. God.


We find out the genders of our children on March 24th!  WHAHOOZA!

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